Monday, March 28, 2011

Re-Visiting The Headgates and...a Self-Government A-ha

We had a really wonderful couple of discussions groups at our Phases HIP Night the other night! I came away from it with a renewed desire to re-read The Headgate article from Kerri Tibbets. Everything she says makes perfect sense...it's the implementation that is easier said than done (for some things.) We are working as a family, to understand what right and wrong headgates look like for a family with some special needs. I will be pondering that this week! After a little relapse with a weekly movie night (something we had decided was too addicting for our kiddo's, even weekly...especially our boys), we have decided that we will go back to no movies for a while. I think we will really just trade them in for some needed books at Bookman's! They've been all packed up and ready to go, but sat here near the t.v. and thus got watched again. Mr. Man and I, are trying to figure out where we can hide our t.v. I think we'll move it to the garage for a while and only get it out for special occasions. Heck...it's so big, we should really just get rid of it and purchase a smaller one, for occasions when we would use it. Hmmm...we'll have to talk about that today! Anyway...I will be spending my free time reading and studying The Headgates today! I've just gotta' get this right for our family! It's just time!

I had a Teaching Self-Government A-ha moment yesterday! I don't even know what page I was reading but it's the part that talks about a little girl named Morgan who was touching all the sewing machines at a church activity and getting constant time-outs. It basically talks about how kids will sometimes choose negative choices because they don't what the positive alternative is. I think that's what is happening with our oldest son. He is in a really bad habit of choosing to whine. I don't even think he knows really what he is whining about. I tried presenting him with the positive alternative today, but he has ultimately chosen to whine and has already lost his privileges for the day. I've just got to keep presenting a positive option and letting him see that positive option in practice for the other kiddo's and hope that he will eventually choose the positive choice. If not, he's going to end up doing quite a few extra chores. That's hard for the Mr. and I, because we really want him to choose happiness! We will keep at it though, and say lots of prayers!

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