Monday, November 29, 2010

Why I am the Mom that I am

I read THIS today! This story resonated with me! It's a story by a fellow home schooler, who attended high school where I did. I don't know her, but I love her examples and the inspiration she provides to me! I wanted to post a link to it here, because it speaks to why I am the way I am when it comes to parenting my children.
I know what LOTS of people think about me! They think I am paranoid and that I don't trust people and that my hands are full and I am crazy. (Then there are those who love me unconditionally, and who "GET IT"!) :0) I don't consider myself paranoid at all, but rather the kind of girl who would rather be safe than sorry. We are advocates for our kiddo's, plain and simple! We know what they need and don't need! Everyone else just thinks they know. I know some people have some strong opinions and feelings about me, because lots of them tell me...and of those who don't tell me, their facial expressions or comments or whispers under their breath say it all. It doesn't matter what they think...but sometimes I have to stop and remind myself of that! LOL :0)
I hold on to my children relentlessly. I hold on to them because they and Mr. Man are my EVERYTHING. I hold onto them because despite what anyone may think, I have labored for them to be mine, in the same way that a birth mother labors for her children. My labor has just taken a different form, and it has taken MUCH longer! I don't take my children for granted. I am sorry to say that there are lots of parents who do. I guess having 17 children come to stay, one or two at a time, and then suddenly disappear from your life , is part of the reason that I don't take them for granted. After as long as 2 1/2 years of court dates, visits and meetings with case managers and licensing workers,etc., it wasn't until that judge banged his gavel and declared our adoption complete, that we could breathe and rest. Children are such blessings! They are little, walking miracles and they are smarter than anyone ever realizes! I cringe every time I hear someone say "Oh, I can't wait until Spring Break is over...my kids are driving me nuts!" That's terrible! Now...I get it! Everyone needs a break to re-group every now and then, but we should always remember how blessed we are to have our children in our lives! They should never be treated as burdens to us! How blessed I am, to be here with them each day! They teach me so much! They ask amazing questions and give amazing answers to my questions! They make me laugh and cry and think! They inspire me to be the best I can be! I am glad that the situation described in the above linked story, has never happened to us! But this sweet story was still a wonderful reminder of why I hold on to them so tightly! And it gives me strength to plant my feet, and face whatever anyone thinks they know, about our family and our situations! Some people may think they know what's what. They may think they know better than me and Mr. Man, about what is best for our children! They can think what they want! We aren't letting go of our children...not for anyone or anything!

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Holiday Happenings and other news

Today we made pies. What else are ya' gonna' do the day before Thanksgiving, right? 2 Pumpkin and 2 Apple Crumb Pies. Yum! We will take at least 2 of them to the festivities tomorrow. One of the best parts about making pies is Kid Pie! I just learned about this idea a couple of weeks ago! With the pie crust scraps, you form it into little balls rolled in sugar and cinnamon and baked in the oven! My kiddo's LOVE this and it keeps their cute, chubby fingers out of what I am doing! LOVE it!
I am looking for a Jazzercise class to take! I have GOT to exercise...not only for my waistline, but for my sanity as well! Jazzercise is really fun and you forget you are exercising...well you almost forget! Anyone know of a Jazzercise class anywhere? Anyone wanna' go with me? It's really fun, I mean it! I really need to lose about 20 lbs.
Speaking of weight, Miss Ladybug has lost a full pound. Not cool, when you are a G-tube patient and when you don't eat anything by mouth. We still can't figure out just why she lost weight. Sometimes this is easily explained by an excessive growth spurt in height, but she only gained about 1/2 an inch in height this time. Her G.I. Dr. said that her immune disorder could explain some of this, because if her body is burning more and more energy trying to keep herself well, but we are increasing her feeds by one can a day, to stay on top of this. This means, that now she gets 1000ml of formula a night, and another 750ml during the day through a bolus feed. It's really such a catch 22, because when she's so full of formula, she doesn't want to eat, and if she doesn't learn to eat on her own, then she'll never get off the G-tube, but the tube is also sustaining her life right now. It's always one thing or another around here. We are definitely always on our toes!
I am going to be learning more about sewing this weekend, from my Mom! The children have asked for "Cowboy Clothes" from Santa, so we'll see how well "Mrs. Claus" can do. Wish me luck! I found the cutest pattern for "Pioneer Aprons" for the girls, and am still looking for a pattern for bonnets. They want to look like Laura and Mary from Little House. They've all asked for stick horses too! I am excited because we found a wonderful website that makes homemade wooden toys and they had the greatest stick horses on there...enough that each child will get one that looks different from everyone else! Christmas here we come!

Sunday, November 21, 2010

I found this article by way of The Blaze. And while there

Saturday, November 20, 2010

It's Thanksgiving Time!

I am SO excited for this time of year! Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays! I love the fall colors (especially since we don't really see many Fall colors here), and I love that our attention is called to the blessings we receive so abundantly, from our Heavenly Father! (It drives me crazy, that the world skims right over this special holiday and jumps right to what we can "get" instead of stopping to give thanks for what we "have".) So with a grateful heart for all that I have, I wanted to list some of the things that I am thankful for:

The Gospel of Jesus Christ and a Savior who loves me and died for me
A living Prophet of God, Thomas S. Monson
My Beautiful and Precious Family and temples in which we are sealed for eternity.
Extended Family who I adore
Friends
The Scriptures which give needed instruction
The Holy Ghost
A roof over our heads and a landlord who has been kind and gracious with us
Food to eat and stored food for a rainy day
Water to drink and water for a rainy day
Mr. Man's job and the insurance benefits it provides
Adoption Subsidy which helps us care for our children and their special needs
modern conveniences like washers and driers and ovens and dishwashers
Lots of skilled doctors who help us care for 2 special people in our family
Therapists who love our children and teach them weekly
Books to read, that help us gain important knowledge
The freedom and ability to home educate ourselves and our family
This wonderful country... The United States of America, and the Founding Fathers who fought for us to be free
A life free from physical bondage and/or slavery (so far)
Nature and all of it's beauty
Animals for food and friendship
Music
The 5 Senses of Sight, Sound, Touch, Taste and Smell, and that we all have them
Mobility and the ability to walk around (we pray each day that Wiggle will continue to walk on his own.)
Protection from harm or accidents
Ancestors and geneology
A pioneer heritage
.............................The list goes on........................................

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving everyone! Pause to thank Him who gives you all that you have! Our Father in Heaven has been and continues to be very good to us!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Hours of Operation

Good Morning Everyone~

The time has come where Mr. Man and I have decided that we need to lay down some ground rules, about receiving phone calls, so that we can have uninterrupted time each day for our family. As you all know, we are homeschooling, and with that decision, comes the need for prioritizing some things, and given the fact that with therapies and doctors appointments we have precious little time for prioritizing, we just HAD to make some tough decisions about some things! We would ask that you refrain from calling our home between the hours of 7 a.m. til' 2 p.m. (You can call as early as 6 a.m.) each day, UNLESS IT IS AN EMERGENCY, in which case, please let us know. (By emergency, we're talking...someone's life is at stake or someone is stranded somewhere and needs our help or someone is heading to the hospital, or someone died or something.) Please use your best judgment with this! It is not our desire to take ourselves off the planet and out of everyone's lives, but rather, to give priority time where it is due...for our children and our unique family situations. We would also ask that you respect our bedtime routine for our children and not call between 6:15 - 7:30 p.m., and would also ask that we receive evening phone calls NO LATER than 9 p.m. Please be courteous of the fact that we have a young daughter with a severe and chronic sleep disturbance and that we will be in bed at 9 p.m. each evening, resting up for the many hours we spend awake with her at various times of the night and early morning. If I don't rest when I can, my health is jeopardized, and Mr. Man works varying hours and often gets up for work very early in the morning. If he doesn't get rest, his health and safety are jeopardized. I know this is a lot to remember, so here it is in a nutshell:

Hansen Family Time: (Please do not call during these hours, EXCEPT in an emergency!)
7 a.m. - 2 p.m.

(You may call as early as 6 a.m., however, we reserve the right to change that if we get bombarded with early morning phone calls!) :0)

Please respect our bedtime routine for our children, between 6:15 - 7:30 p.m. (This is a time consuming process involving the giving of medications and starting tube feedings. We like to have calm and quiet for this time, so that everyone can wind down!

Please do not call any later than 9 p.m., in respect for tired bodies and needed rest.

In a nutshell: Please only call us between the hours of 2 p.m. to 6: 15 p.m. or between 7:30 and 9 p.m.

Please also understand, that we need to be strict about this schedule, so please don't be offended if you call at 6:05 p.m. and we can't talk for long or if you call at 8:45 p.m. and we can't talk past 9 p.m. Gone are the days when we can stay on the phone for hours at a time. Life is just too crazy for that! Sorry! :0)
Please know that we love you all and that you are important to us...just not quite as important as our little ones! :0) (you can laugh at that...it's not meant to hurt your feelings!) :0)

Please contact us by email, ANYTIME YOU WISH! (if you have our e-mail address!) I will email you back when it is convenient, and don't be surprised if that falls during the hours when we have asked you not to call us! :0)
We appreciate your love, support and understanding! Please let me know if you have questions or concerns about this!
Hugs and Blessings to you all!

Monday, November 15, 2010

Criteria

We had an appointment for Miss Ladybug today. It was kind of a big one. Today we met with the nurse practitioner for the developmental pediatrician. Today we received confirmation that she does fit the criteria for Autism. This isn't earth shattering information. Mr. Man and I, have known for quite some time, that she likely had Autism. (BTW...she will receive the diagnosis in a few months, when she actually sees the developmental pediatrician.) But...it's still a hard bite to swallow. In some ways, it's a relief to be one step closer to knowing this for sure. In other ways, it brings up more questions about what this will mean for her, in her life. But we are grateful to be living in a time, when so much help is available to her! The nurse practitioner said that she does recommend that Ladybug be evaluated by, AND attend, the local special needs program at the public school. I said "Well, I can almost guarantee you that we won't be doing that...no, I can absolutely guarantee you we won't be doing that!" :0) Then, I told her about all of the ways that the public school system let my Snug-a-Bug down, and how much we LOVE homeschooling and feel that it is best for our family! She was supportive and kind about it! (She echoed our amazement at how they had let Snug down!) What a refreshing change of pace! When some medical professionals find out that you home school (especially, when some of your children have special needs), you'd be amazed at how they look at you like you're crazy and choosing terribly for your children. She didn't look at me that way, at all! It was great! So, we have some more paperwork to fill out, and we have some paperwork for her therapists to fill out, and we will plug along in this journey called Advocating for Our Children! It's funny to me, how many people told me I was overreacting or crazy to think my kiddo's had this or that. I have been correct about almost every single thing! Mother's intuition is a blessing and it is something I will never EVER question! How grateful I am, for my testimony that I am their mother for very specific reasons! How grateful I am, for a husband who supports and sustains me, as a wife and a mother! How grateful I am, for our children! All of them are great kiddo's, who have an eternal identity and purpose, and who are precious spirit children of our Heavenly Father! THAT is the criteria that matters the most! I am honored to be their mother! :0)

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Follow The Prophet

Our Beloved Prophet

Today I attended stake conference and got to hear our prophet President Thomas S. Monson speak to us! What a treat! He taught us more about helping to lift the hands that hang down and strengthening the feeble knees of those around us! I must say that I LOVE that he talked to us about what we can do to help those around us, and didn't focus at all, on the kinds of circumstances we find ourselves in. If we want to feel peace during this time of unrest in our world, we must help others! Along with President Monson, we heard from Bishop H. David Burton, presiding bishop, Sis. Thompson of the Relief Society General Presidency and Elder Cook of the twelve. Bishop Burton spoke about gratitude, sister Thompson spoke about strengthening our faith and studying the scriptures, and Elder Cook spoke about the power of our example in our communities, among other things. What a joy it is, to hear from our church leaders, about the things that are important to them, and therefore, to us! There is no fear or trepidation in our future, when we listen to them. We were counseled again today, to be prepared. I know that as we spend time and attention in preparation for things to come, we will better be able to be instruments in the Lord's hands, to help those about us! What a strength we can be, to others, if we have faith instead of fear! I am grateful for this conference experience today! I took some great notes and will enjoy sharing these things with my family this week! I am SO grateful for a personal testimony that President Monson truly is a prophet of God, and that I belong to the true church on the earth today, even The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints! Heavenly Father speaks to President Monson and we are wise to follow his counsel and trust in his words! It is my prayer, that as we go throughout this holiday season, that we will have one of the most spiritual holiday experiences ever, and that we won't allow the commercialism and weight of the world, invade on the peace and spirit of this wonderful time of year! In the Name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Georgic---I LOVED this!

I read an article (okay...I read PART of it...motherhood interrupted me), and I LOVED what I read! I have heard of the word "georgic", before and have a desire to learn more about it. What do you think?

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Low

Am I the only one who over estimates their abilities? I have such a desire to be involved in things, that sometimes I think I can do more than I am really capable of. I marvel at the trust the Lord places in me. Just about every day, I throw my hands up in the air and ask Him is he's sure He has the right girl for this job or that! I understand that I am supposed to grow and stretch and learn lessons through life's experiences, but it just seems these days, that the only lesson I am learning, is that I am not enough. So...I am feeling low today! (Shocker, I know!) My posts have all been party poopers, lately! Sorry! I seriously need a break from life. A pause button would be AWESOME! I am just spread too thin and it's hard to justify hard work here...and not enough work there. I CAN'T do it all! I Can't!

Monday, November 8, 2010

How To Prioritize

I came across this video this morning and it was just the "Re-Group" that I needed. I thought I would share it with you! It is a video from the church website and it is Julie B. Beck speaking about How to Prioritize. It's very short, simple and to the point. I needed to start over with my priorities and put first things first. It's very easy, in a family with so much needed and going on, to just start scrambling around trying to check things off of a list and do what I call the things of "Eminent Need." These are the things that can't help but prioritize themselves, if we don't organize our lives enough to put everything in it's place. It's not to say that these things of eminent need, are not important, on the contrary, they are extremely important, but Heavenly Father didn't mean for them to take over the importance of everything else that is needful in our lives. He has given us a way to prioritize our lives and provide order, so that we start with the priceless essentials that allow every other thing to get done in an orderly and stress-free way! And most importantly, when we do the essentials, the windows of heaven are opened up to us, and we are better able to receive the spiritual promptings of a Heavenly Father who has a plan for everything we need to do!

This week...I am focusing on the essentials. Period. Yes, I will cook and clean and keep the laundry moving. But I am not going to try and change or institute any systems, until I have an ample portion of the spirit with me, to let me know the perspective of my Heavenly Father in these plans. That's the goal for this week! More spirit...less chaos! At the end of the week, I'll let you know what I've learned and how my perspectives have changed and how my mind has opened up to new ideas and inspiration!

Friday, November 5, 2010

Teaching Them to Take Care of Things

After an inspiring HIP Night recently, Mr. Man and I decided that we wanted to teach our children to take care of things a little better. So...we went to Goodwill and they each picked out their own glass plate, bowl and cup, to use for every meal! I am SO impressed with them and their ability to be careful with things. (We have only had one broken glass, and we are going on three weeks soon!) Even Miss Ladybug is drinking out of a glass. (We just stopped the whole sippy cup thing, cold turkey.) The children all feel pretty special and their willingness and desire to clean their own dishes after each meal, is pretty great too! Our children have never ceased to amaze us, when it comes to trying new things! They are awesome at toy purges, and just recently told me that they'd like to do another toy purge before Christmas this year! (Not my idea...theirs!) I really believe that less is more, and I have watched as their sweet little bodies have de-stressed and detoxed from ridding themselves of excess "stuff"! We go through their clothes every so often, cycling hand-me-downs, and making sure that each child has no more than about eight outfits a piece. It's wonderful to see their attitudes change, about what's an unnecessary luxury and what is truly needed. It's great to watch them get the most use that they can, out of their things, and to see them stop being as wasteful as they once were! (We have talked about how Laura and Mary shared a cup, for a long time, before they each got their own, and how they each only had a simple Corn Husk doll for a while. We've talked about how they likely only ever had one real doll in their whole lives, and I've watched as this knowledge has affected our kiddo's!) Simplicity is such a beautiful thing! It really does free up your mind and your body to focus on other, more important, truths! I LOVE that my kids LOVE thrift stores! They don't know that it's hand-me-down stuff that was used by others, before it became ours. I have been trying to teach them thrift, and they are just starting to understand what a wonderful thing it is, to give our excess "stuff' to a thrift store, where someone else can purchase and use it! These little life lessons, are joyous to teach them and they in turn, teach me each day, by their perfect examples and humility!

Just One Question...

What happens when you have a tube fed 4 year old daughter (who is like a 2 yr. old in every way), who has a severe sleep disturbance?


Answer: You get the surprise of your life at 2:30 a.m. when she decides to open the feed bag and dump it ALL OVER the floor the wall, herself and her bed! Yeah...Mr. Man and I were up in the middle of the night, cleaning and scrubbing, scrubbing and cleaning. NOT COOL!


BUT...she's precious, we love her, and she knows it! :0)

Thursday, November 4, 2010

"You're the Cutest Mom that I Love"

Leave it to my Luv Bug, to say something that sweet! She climbed up into my lap today, wrapped her arms around me and whispered "You're the cutest Mom, that I love!" How she made my day! After an entry like my post from yesterday, it was another sweet reminder of the reasons why I do all that I do. We finally ordered weighted vests for the girls, and received them the other day. They are helping a lot, with both of them! We will need to order a weighted blanket for Luv Bug, soon, though. Tonight, I got oils on all the kiddo's and sat with Luv Bug in her bed and put her weighted vest on her back, while she laid on her tummy. I just sat with her and waited for the oils the weight and the melatonin, to kick in. She is in Slumberland now. How we love her! She knows she can talk to us about her issues and how she is feeling, and we have seen great improvement in her behavior, when we invite her to talk about it! She knows that we know it's not her fault! She has started asking for her weighted vest when she starts to feel "silly", and she will even ask for a big hug or to rock in the rocking chair, when she starts to feel this way! Bless her sweet, little heart! She really does have lots going on! How grateful we are, that Heavenly Father sent her to our family! We love you Miss Luv! :0)

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Catching My Breath (Vent Warning)

Life is moving way too fast for me! (Yep, folks...this is a vent post, so buckle up your seat belts! Sorry!) I seriously wish the world would just go away and let us relax for a while! A girl can dream, can't she?? :0) I am sure there are many of you, who can relate to this feeling. I am stressing out and I don't like it one bit! I don't think I could even begin to list all the things that are on my mind at any given moment! BUT...I'll try...because my brain is on overload and if I don't list it all and make some kind of sense of it somewhere, it just might explode! There is always something to be thinking about and doing. There's always a kiddo' that needs an appointment to see a doctor of some sort, always a test or procedure of some kind that one of them needs. (Today, it was Ladybug having her blood taken AGAIN...for the umpteen millionth time! Yesterday, it was Wiggle Bug at the orthopedist. He was supposed to see his cranial surgeon on Monday, but was so sick he couldn't go anywhere.) And they are precious and sweet, and deserve the best care! There's always cooking, cleaning, dishes, laundry, therapy, scheduling, meetings, phone calls, reading, tube feedings,job training for kiddo's,etc. that all need a piece of me. Not to mention, special time for each kiddo' and Mr. Man, personal prayers, personal scripture study, family prayers and scripture study, family home evening, homeschooling time, home school group responsibilities, etc. etc. etc. (I know you're all wondering why I don't have church listed...that's because I don't have any church responsibilities. I spend my Sunday's walking the halls with one or both of my girls, who have very real issues that are challenges for them at church and other public places.) Yikes! Am I the only one that never gets to sit for 2 seconds and just catch my breath? Seriously! It's not healthy for me, to be so stressed out and bogged down! And how do you say "No!" to things, when they are all important? A 6 Month "No!" does not exist in my world. What do I say "No!" to??? There's not a thing on my plate that's not important. Not one thing. So pardon me for a moment, while I have a bit of a pity party!

(*elevator music playing*............................)

I am having a hard time right now! I think I am finally realizing that I am not Wonder Woman, and it's a hard brick wall to hit! I can't do it all! But I HAVE to. My health is seriously at risk. I've gained about 15 pounds and lost countless hours of sleep. ("Then why are you blogging at 10 p.m. at night?", you ask? Writing or "typing" is a way that I can get my emotions and frustrations out. Plus...this blog serves as my journal, and I am just trying to prove to history, that I didn't have it all together all the time.) (Lest my Wonder Woman abilities fool anyone.) :0) I don't sit down during the day. I don't eat as often as I should, hence the weight gain. I don't drink enough water. I don't spend enough time with my scriptures. My studies are non-existent. I am in one of those situations where I have put myself last, every single time, and it's catching up to me. You know...it's the whole empty cup thing. My cup is running on empty and I am finding it hard to fill it up, which is a very necessary thing,in order for me to keep filling everyone else's cup. So...I am going to go talk to the Lord again, tonight. Just to tell Him what's going on and how hard I am trying and how broken I feel. I am grateful to know He is real and the He listens to me. It's possible that I don't ask for His help enough. I just feel like I am meant to bear all of these burdens and that women have done this forever and that I have no room to complain or ask for help. I am supposed to be strong and have all the answers! I am supposed to have it all together and all figured out. Well, I don't. Right now, I am just trying to learn how to breath, all over again! I can't help but feel like a trip to Acapulco or something, is the only way for me to get a break from some of these things. Maybe I should go to a place that actually exists...because I've been to Crazy...and Crazy isn't working for me anymore!

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Get Out and Vote Today!

I hope everyone has taken or will be taking the opportunity to vote and let your voice be heard for our country today! Our country is in grave danger, unless we all realize the significant blessings our Father in Heaven continues to bless us with, and also the impact our vote can have! We cannot complain about how things are going in our country, for our children and ourselves,if we do not vote our consciences this day! We know that one of the signs of the last days, is that the constitution will hang by a thread. I shudder to think of a more volatile situation for our constitution, than exists right now. Satan is tricky. He is skilled at making evil look good and good look evil. May we pray for the spirit of the Lord to guide us in these all important decisions for our country! Our country has been sleeping...oblivious to the crumbling that is taking place all around us. It's WAY past time, that we wake up, stand up, and fight to keep what our founding fathers fought and sacrificed for, alive and upheld! May God bless this great nation, brought forth through His mercy and grace! May we each do the hard work necessary, to learn about it's founding, and those who sacrificed so much, because they loved us! May we stop following the crowd, but instead, forge our own trails to preserve all that is good and uplifting and wholesome! May we have the courage to go against the "norm", if need be, to do those things that we have been divinely inspired to do for our families and our communities. May heaven's blessings be upon this election! Goodness knows, we need them! :0)

Monday, November 1, 2010

Of Pumpkin Cookies, Table Activities and Blessings

We had a lovely evening, last night! Having a porch light that doesn't work, and a husband who disconnected the doorbell just in case, made for a nice night. Our evening was not interrupted once, and we spent it making homemade pumpkin cookies with orange butter cream frosting, complete with sprinkles, and laughing together and doing some fun family activities. For example, the kids had gone crazy about a simple, little book we found at the thrift store, and each couldn't wait to try their hand at tracing numbers and number words. (So much, for waiting til they opened the Joy Cabinet this morning.) They can't wait to play with this book again, today. And I am particularly excited about their interest in learning to write properly. Especially, since it's completely their idea and not mine! Inspiration is magical! :0)

I had a nice talk with Heavenly Father yesterday, and told Him that I need His help to know what things are most important to focus on for each member of our family, and which things I can just let go of. It was a nice conversation, and I received some answers about quite a few things. Before my prayer, I had sat and pondered each person in our family, and wrote down the first things that came to my mind, about what they need. Life has been a bit overwhelming lately! I have lots of extra things on my plate and I am concerned that I do them all well, especially when it comes to the wife and mother department. I know that Heavenly Father is blessing me. After hearing from the Solomon's at our HIP Night the other night, I told Heavenly Father that I'd really like to know the best way to do our laundry around here. I have some more pondering and praying to do about that,still. I have felt prompted that Snug needs a project to work on. After my prayer, and a quick little meeting with Snug, we have a little plan that we are both excited about! I received spiritual promptings for each person in our family, as related to relationships and inspiring learning. Other promptings he sent to me, were to proceed with my home school group responsibilities in the same way that I've been doing, and not to worry about what everyone else thinks about it. I am grateful to know of His love and support for me! It is hard to gain the self confidence to lead, when you are used to doing what someone else has assigned or told you to do. It's not a fun leap of faith to take, nevertheless, I am taking it. I am determined to learn whatever He will teach me, through this process, no matter what it is. So...I have some new wind in my sails, about people and relationships, and other responsibilities that are in my stewardship. I am one blessed girl! And when I look for those blessings and ask Heavenly Father to weigh in on where I am headed and what I am doing, the blessings just keep pouring in. And THAT'S a great thing!